So, I found myself in a weird place tonight. I was talking to my dad and suddenly the role of parent and child was switched. I was the one counseling and reassuring and saying, "Everything's going to be alright, really". But it wasn't me saying those things, because if it had been me I would have been relying on that parent, I would have been scared, I would have felt like my world was falling apart, caving in around me. Ceiling getting closer..closer! But I know that My Father has the power over good and evil and is not the person standing before me. He is all-encompassing and is able to do things beyond my power. Tonight that is what my true Father did, He gave me the words to speak to my earthly father. He spoke love to my father through me. I could not listen to my physical fathers response to my words, God just gave me the words to say not the power to respond to what my dad said. I found myself feeling the hurt I know God must feel for this man, his son. The immense pain God has seeing his son suffer, seeing His son refuse to accept help. Denial is his medicine, he lives off of it, but It is not working. His one alibi, his one friend, his one safety has left the island he is inhabiting by himself. He has no one to talk to, no one to confide in, he is alone until he makes the choice to start wading out into the sea. Wading, then swimming and finally screaming until he has to admit, before drowning, that he needs help and he needs people to help him. SO here I am speaking to a man that I thought I always knew through and though, but not really. God has shown me the truth and I cannot go back to that island, and so I wait for this friend of so many years,this companion, this friend, this "blood brother", this love of my life, who I feel motherly affection for. I greatly desire this man to be free, to feel the love from his father that I feel. To know the freedom that is waiting for him out there in that wide, open, spacious, ocean of love with a great depth. I long for him to be free of that island, I hate that Island, I hate it, I hate that he feels safe there. It isn't safe, their are wild animals on that island that can attack him. All alone, he has no one to protect him. Now I, his one companion, I have left him. I am frightened that he will be devoured without me there to protect him. I am frightened that he will go mad, without me there to talk to. But I know that My redeemer lives, and I know that my savior can save him as well... So please DADDY, save my dad soon... I love you dad, I love you and I am waiting for you, here in this ocean of love...
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